You would think that I'd learned my lesson when I was in 6th grade and I was showing off on my skateboard in front of the girls and lost it.
Or maybe when I was a junior in high school and I was demonstrating how to disarm a knife-wielding psychopath and launched a pocketknife into the arm of the girl I had a crush on.
Or maybe in college when I was showing my buddies how I knew my way around a pack of cigarettes and ended up launching my lunch.
Tonight's bike hang was at our house and it was fun. Yet I couldn't leave well enough alone. I had to show off my new tubing bender. The plan was to bend up a 16" long oval.
Damnit to hell. Stupid shithead. Probably good that everyone was standing there or else I'd have punched myself in the face. Repeatedly.
I couldn't risk laying awake all night thinking about that abomination on my bench. It had to be fixed.
I can hardly wait til I'm 85 and I turn my head into mashed potatoes popping wheelies in my wheelchair for the chicks in my nursing home.
It's probably futile, but on the off chance that I can help even one person, I beg you. Please. Don't show off!