The phrase isn't mine. It's from a recent NYCBS post that left an impression.
And then, as fate would have it, our very own Spokane craigslist produced this add that takes the whole concept to the next level:
The link will eventually die, so here's the text:
"nice mountian bike. brand new.all it needs is a new chain.Its rusted.This bike is new.It can be repaired.It set out in the rain.call for info"